The number of people who will still not weasel out of inappropriate,crippling, distressing relationships in this century full of freedoms still baffles me. Some people will appear mature and wise but still condone 'douchebaggeryness' in relationships, making that one decision of disallowing being treated in belittling manner appears like algebraic geometry.
People day in day out accept to be treated crudely,they choose to stay month after month, year after year until some are killed or seriously assaulted. Some have had their faces acid-burnt by the violent partner, got stabbed by their drug abusing partner as the end result of keeping up with their partner's evident common-senselessness, violence and unmannerliness. People have given various excuses to justify their desperate tolerance like; what about the children, the guy is rich, his mother and sisters are cool, what the people and the pastor will say or think...etc of which are very lame reasons in today's world. Your life is your own.
Some of the FISH-STORIES I have heard women give...
• But we have known each other for so long! I have met acquaintances and friends who will have a man who is treating them like trash, sleep around without giving a rats behind, disrespect them majorly, and the women excuse is 'but we've known each other for 6 years' i cannot just leave! Its not the number of years you've known a person that counts, its how they are making you feel NOW, how they are treating you NOW, how much they value you NOW. People change as they grow and know themselves, and you may have changed as much as he may have changed his choice of a girlfriend.
• But i love him! There is a brand of women and men who will continue accepting loads of bullshit from their partner just because 'they love them so much, they cannot live without them' and they cannot think beyond that box. Again, love is not blind, you are. Even if you love someone, give them time off to grow up, if they come back, take them, if they don't, it was not meant to be.
• But the sex is great! Women will stay in traumatizing relationships, relationships that devalue them, relationships that are emotionally draining, that make them feel like they're walking on eggshells, just because that guy's Johnson and sons hits her like its hurricane! eventually after his amazing johnson is all tired and old, you'll have to live with the rotten personality. Make your choice maturely for the long-haul.
• But He is a hot catch! Well, so many of us get in relationships or rather attachments with the outer characteristics of a person, the light skin ninjas, the light skin girls, the tall and dark handsome men, and blatantly refuse to see beyond prettiness and handsomeness which fades, while character stays. A hot guy is a guy every girl wants and he knows it and when he is immature he will treat the bunch of girls that want him, including you, like he doesn't care, because he actually doesn't since he can get any girl whenever. Go for character. Being handsome has never put food on the table...well, unless he is a gigolo.
• But dating is so exhausting I am a woman and i'm very conscious of the fact that we stay in bad, draining relationships just because we do not want to go back and wait for someone else since the dating process is tiring. We feel its so much work stepping back into the starting point to impress a new guy all over again, which is true, but i'm also a believer that a day wasted in the wrong relationship,is a day that you could have dated and liked a new person. Give yourself a break. Reality is; we are nothing to certain persons in this world, and we are also everything to just one or even two persons in this world, you only need to find that ONE person who values you.
• But his mom is great Some of us have to wake up and realize that we shall not marry "their" parent, their mother, we shall marry the person himself, whether his mom likes you and calls you every other day, it doesn't matter when he is treating you like you do not matter to him, treating you like some option, some piece of work, physically and emotionally abusing you, You know what?, when you show him you'll take it anyway, that's all you will get from him all your life!. When its your dad or mom that loves that irresistible man so much and encourages you to stay on because the man is really likable and they know his parents well, when the man is not THAT nice and into YOU, it's YOU who gets to keep up with his moronic shenanigans and not your parents.
• But he is the father of my child! [sign] Hundredths of us have stuck with wicked men because they fathered our kids. Some women still hallucinate that if a pregnancy occurs the man will 'wake up' and start being nice, wake up and act like a father he is supposed to act like, and when he doesn't, they think if they force a marriage the guy will finally realize her efforts and give in into treating her like a jewel she is. BUT this are all mere illusions, if a man is treating you like you do not matter, treating you like one of his boys, telling your boys you are his "bitch" when in your presence...he will not change because you now live in the same house neither because you have baby together. A leopard does not change its stripes because it rained.
• But he will change if i give him time Yes, yes yes...men [some] eventually change [or pretend to have changed], but not just for any woman. They change for THAT ONE woman THEY choose to change for. It's the logic behind a guy who swore a hundred times to you five months ago that he will never ever ever get married...then suddenly he gets respectful, gets married and gets a stable job [after being a bumming disrespectful boyfriend to you], because HIS kind of RIGHT woman came along.
Sincerely,
Njoki_TheGoodBadGirl ©2015
People day in day out accept to be treated crudely,they choose to stay month after month, year after year until some are killed or seriously assaulted. Some have had their faces acid-burnt by the violent partner, got stabbed by their drug abusing partner as the end result of keeping up with their partner's evident common-senselessness, violence and unmannerliness. People have given various excuses to justify their desperate tolerance like; what about the children, the guy is rich, his mother and sisters are cool, what the people and the pastor will say or think...etc of which are very lame reasons in today's world. Your life is your own.
Some of the FISH-STORIES I have heard women give...
• But we have known each other for so long! I have met acquaintances and friends who will have a man who is treating them like trash, sleep around without giving a rats behind, disrespect them majorly, and the women excuse is 'but we've known each other for 6 years' i cannot just leave! Its not the number of years you've known a person that counts, its how they are making you feel NOW, how they are treating you NOW, how much they value you NOW. People change as they grow and know themselves, and you may have changed as much as he may have changed his choice of a girlfriend.
• But i love him! There is a brand of women and men who will continue accepting loads of bullshit from their partner just because 'they love them so much, they cannot live without them' and they cannot think beyond that box. Again, love is not blind, you are. Even if you love someone, give them time off to grow up, if they come back, take them, if they don't, it was not meant to be.
• But the sex is great! Women will stay in traumatizing relationships, relationships that devalue them, relationships that are emotionally draining, that make them feel like they're walking on eggshells, just because that guy's Johnson and sons hits her like its hurricane! eventually after his amazing johnson is all tired and old, you'll have to live with the rotten personality. Make your choice maturely for the long-haul.
• But He is a hot catch! Well, so many of us get in relationships or rather attachments with the outer characteristics of a person, the light skin ninjas, the light skin girls, the tall and dark handsome men, and blatantly refuse to see beyond prettiness and handsomeness which fades, while character stays. A hot guy is a guy every girl wants and he knows it and when he is immature he will treat the bunch of girls that want him, including you, like he doesn't care, because he actually doesn't since he can get any girl whenever. Go for character. Being handsome has never put food on the table...well, unless he is a gigolo.
• But dating is so exhausting I am a woman and i'm very conscious of the fact that we stay in bad, draining relationships just because we do not want to go back and wait for someone else since the dating process is tiring. We feel its so much work stepping back into the starting point to impress a new guy all over again, which is true, but i'm also a believer that a day wasted in the wrong relationship,is a day that you could have dated and liked a new person. Give yourself a break. Reality is; we are nothing to certain persons in this world, and we are also everything to just one or even two persons in this world, you only need to find that ONE person who values you.
• But his mom is great Some of us have to wake up and realize that we shall not marry "their" parent, their mother, we shall marry the person himself, whether his mom likes you and calls you every other day, it doesn't matter when he is treating you like you do not matter to him, treating you like some option, some piece of work, physically and emotionally abusing you, You know what?, when you show him you'll take it anyway, that's all you will get from him all your life!. When its your dad or mom that loves that irresistible man so much and encourages you to stay on because the man is really likable and they know his parents well, when the man is not THAT nice and into YOU, it's YOU who gets to keep up with his moronic shenanigans and not your parents.
• But he is the father of my child! [sign] Hundredths of us have stuck with wicked men because they fathered our kids. Some women still hallucinate that if a pregnancy occurs the man will 'wake up' and start being nice, wake up and act like a father he is supposed to act like, and when he doesn't, they think if they force a marriage the guy will finally realize her efforts and give in into treating her like a jewel she is. BUT this are all mere illusions, if a man is treating you like you do not matter, treating you like one of his boys, telling your boys you are his "bitch" when in your presence...he will not change because you now live in the same house neither because you have baby together. A leopard does not change its stripes because it rained.
• But he will change if i give him time Yes, yes yes...men [some] eventually change [or pretend to have changed], but not just for any woman. They change for THAT ONE woman THEY choose to change for. It's the logic behind a guy who swore a hundred times to you five months ago that he will never ever ever get married...then suddenly he gets respectful, gets married and gets a stable job [after being a bumming disrespectful boyfriend to you], because HIS kind of RIGHT woman came along.
Sincerely,
Njoki_TheGoodBadGirl ©2015
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