Playing Russian roulette
I have heard girls & boys, gents and ladies complain of how much they are consistently attracting assholes and serial time wasters into their lives that always leaves them hurting and regreting ever engaging in the dating pool race....The thing is, no one really attracts a certain celibre of people, we rather accept these wayward people into our lives and then hope fast and pray the characters will feel a little bit of mercy and change their sneaky ways and be nice to us...and the truth is, shit don't happen. No matter how much you sacrifice your good ass for an unavailable ass he/she won't suddenly or ever get all merciful and change because you happen to be crying all night and or complain of how much mentally, emotionally threatened or strained you feel. Change comes from within, it's an inside job, the particular person must Want to take charge of his/her own behavior and there's nothing an outsider [who is you] can do to change them.
Like when you start 'seeing' a guy that never pulls a chair for you, doesn't play chivalry, doesn't pay your part of the bill at the restaurant, and its your kinda thing, there's nothing you can do to make him start doing it. You accepted him, so you must keep up. Like when you want to get married, and you go on a dating site, or find a guy who clearly has put across that he doesn't want to Ever ever get married, doesn't want to Ever ever have kids, you accept them since they were cute, when you get together, you wont change a MAN with that mind just because you do him all the 69 monkey styles in bed, again,When you fully accept a depressed violent alcoholic in the guise that, your love shower for him will change him to a good church going husband, you wont, you cant, you're not a therapist or a rehab. When he doesn't want, he doesn't, you accepted him that way, keep up.
Eyes Wide Shut.
Like when you start seeing some guy, and he clearty has shown you he doesn't like texting, even after sleeping with him 100x he wont start loving the throwing a random lovey dovey word or two thingy. He Won't. Like if you notice that guy you so badly want to date or sleep with wears extremely skinny jeans till todger can't breath....when you finally are together he wont stop don'ing yellow skinnys and those huge plastic shoes because "you don't like guys who do skinny jeans and plastic shoes" No He Wont. You accepted the fashion error show, keep watching.
Like when a guy clearly states on Facebook or wherever that he is not looking for a serious relationship, that he is out seeking 'fun', that he is only interested in a ONS, FWB or just the benefits only, or even 'open relationships crapiola, once you've accepted this type, you're signed in with a certified man-ho' and he won't change just because you want him to change. You chose that talent in him, play on the Russian roulette. good-luck, you'll need it.
Like when he brags how much he beat up his last 42 girlfriends black and blue for spoiling his toaster or hitting his car at the gate...and you accept to stay with him "because people are not perfect, that bitch deserved it" yada yada yada yada yada yada..... you feel that you're so special he won't dare lay a finger on you, darling, even the immediate ex was once special and red alert he is affording to go lights blazing braggin' about it. Violence especially doesn't just fade because you've been accepting it, just look at couples who physically fight, they never stop, ever. There's no mercy that comes forth, they only learn to keep the noises down by upping the tv volume, while blows get harder. You accepted the bull, keep crying. Like when you readily accept the hot dude who refer to you as his "super hot bitch" well, he will not stop De-valuing you, subtracting you, dividing you, disregarding you or insulting you comfortably just because you're now his official chick. It just doesn't work that way.
Instead of trying to change someone, why not just pick exactly what you want? Be specific, if you want a serious relationship, only Entertain and go out with a person who has shown or said they want the same kind of arrangement. They exist, trying to change wayward people is a job that you won't get paid for. If you want a man that want to have kids in the near future accept that one that loves kids and cant wait to have his own, loving a lunatic that doesn't like the idea of babies at home [tells you so], hates and scares kids away wont help your endeavors. Its more like planting cucumber and expecting french beans to sprout. Its worthless, its draining tryna' deal with people who are evidently 'out of your boundary'.
Its like a game of cards, take a gander at 'em, make your move...
Njoki, The-Good-Bad-Girl
#TeamNoBullshit.
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