There are several stages of depression, know where you belong, its easier when you are aware. The bullies in schools are no different-they have self regard issues within, the self pro-claimed "players"- that guy has self esteem issues, he hates himself and thinks that being a player will solve it, by having excess sexual encounters then bragging about it- loud. You see young girls at 19 - barely full grown already injecting botox and hip & breast boosters, young girls bleaching their faces to get the pumpkin colour, girls at 25 taking fertility pills afraid they might not get kids from all the aborted babies or even afraid of the result of too much FP pills from age 15. Young fellaz smoking pipe and getting full body tattoos [then regretting in 2 months] to look cool...They think some of these kind of actions will earn them some T.L.C and attention they badly crave for.
Depression knows no class, its like death. Both rich kids and 'poor' kids fall victim, especially the rich kids, who mostly never get attention from their super BUSY parents - these kids only see their parents on Sundays [when parents are busy making plans for the week ahead] or not at all -- they get through the difficult teen-hood without a parent's shoulder to cry on, these rich kids cut their wrists with scapels looking for attention or death or even both, while the poor ones can only afford to pinch stuff from the market or take cheap corner drugs. Depression is real, i have had a taste of it at some point in my life, NO one is too special not to fall victim, it crawls and creeps on to you slowly, you get worked up, worried and desperate for something that too close, yet too far.
When you see cranky stone-faced Gen.Y walking headphone intact in these streets, note everyone has his/her own burdens in their heart and mind, the depressed persons will either eat too much, sleep too much or eat too little and suffer insomnia, some will stay online on their computers/phones locked up in their rooms the whole day- looking for 'love' & attention [more by posting nude photos or stalking] and when its doesn't happen [cuz it can't], they get all depressed... Depression is not sadness or some sorrow, sorrow and sadness are like a headache that soon fades out, depression is more like a cancer or some disease that requires medical attention. It's being Down, too down, every time, every day. Being hollow. Everything you liked becomes an eyesore, Depression makes you silently choke in regret, tears and rage, rage that you have no where to empty it to - other than into yourself. You feel a little insane. You become numb and feel pain , at the same freakin' time, you feel inadequate. These intense nothingness drives you into trying to solve difficult matters alone especially after midnight. You weep the whole night, hoping the tears will bring a better day, but only brings a day full of 'eye bags' and paleness.
Depression makes you be afraid to live a day longer, to see people- everyone annoys you, it's one unpleasant absence of hope, of feeling, of positivity, of interests, of response, its an endless grief that cannot be defined easily by the victim, it might be deep or shallow, it all starts from somewhere; it's more in abused kids, deserted kids, uncared for kids who even after growing up, the childhood problems still remain intact turning into a 'cold-case'. These individuals don't like keeping close friends, they become extreme angry loners -don't judge them , they like spending time alone quietly. They let the little whispers tell them things [bad things] in their head, the outside world to them doesn't matter, they only hear the little dark voices in their head, speaking negativity to them, telling them, "you're not attractive" "you're stupid" "your parents hate you" , "you need to sleep with 10 guys in a month to prove you're good in bed" , "you need to join in the player wagon to be noticed by girls" "you need to increase your boob size to get noticed"...etc, The unhelpful Data accumulates in our minds and hearts until we believe everything the "little evil voices" tells us. Deep-blue monster is caused by different things, from brain chemistry to environment, to hormones, sex, drug abuse, genes, difficult life experiences...etc, you never know until it's you, or someone you know.
Depression causes us to sit still until we can hear your own blood pumping around our closely resigned brain, it makes you hear the second hand on the clock ticking-too loud. Our sun stops shining, we persecute our selves, this hopelessness is hard to control, its way easier to complain you have cramps and expound on it, than to explain when you have wild raging thoughts in your head all day, all night. This sickness makes us wish death or a coma or even amnesia on ourselves, so that we can forget everything that surround us. Things that are depressing us are the Unrealistic expectations-wanting perfectness, flawlessness, Childhood issues- some were sexually abused or mistreated- this its a life time trauma, Some are depressed because they are living a lie-they have perfect lives on Facebook but weeping lives beyond their borrowed, second hand or stolen gadgets.
It's very difficult to be friends with a depressed person and to love them, but that LOVE is mostly the only cure they need. Depressed people will resist your friendship, but they actually do need it. It's a mental illness coming on slowly, just like some people will take too much brandy and gins, others just take water and get depressed. People get out of it-when they get help, some, when they decide. Recognize that depression can complicate and break your life completely. Seek help, let someone love you up. Depression is a jail life sentence. Its exhausting.
I'm not a shrink, but its in my interest, when you feel the depression coming on, listen to some music, music helps drown out those little demonic angry voices within ourselves - well, at least for some time. See, Depression, is an enemy within, it turns you against yourself. Love is the solution. Self Love.
Sincerely,
Njoki-TheGood-BadGirl
Good bad girl
ReplyDeleteOh Yes! :)
Delete